whoopee ti yi yo dudes - a suburban cowboy lament
(all-ages version, tune: "Git Along Little Dogies")

[dude]
  one day in the mall, while i sipped an orange slush,
  spied an old clock-puncher come strolling along.
  his hair was slicked back and his change was a-jinglin,
  and as he strolled on, he was singing this song:

[chorus]
 "Whoopee ti yi yo dudes, git along little dogies,
  It's your misfortune and none of my own.
  All the new little boxes just beyond the suburbs,
  Soon that frontier will be your new home."

[clock-puncher]
 "When you were a baby, they (blank, blank blank blank),
  (Blank, blank blank, blank, blank blank).
  Then they (blank blank, blank, blank blank blank),
  And now you are doing the best that you can."

[chorus]
  Whoopee ti yi yo dudes, git along little dogies...

[clock-puncher]
 "Buy a car, go to school, get married, raise kids,
  Take you ninety-nine years to pay off the loans.
  Clothing and food, and a place to live,
  And everything else to keep up with Jones."

[chorus]
  Whoopee ti yi yo dudes, git along little dogies...

[dude]
  so i asked him was that the best he could think of,
  and he got pissed off, and he turned and he said:
[clock-puncher]
 "When I was your age, they made me wash toilets,
  Still got to be done, now it's your job instead!"

[chorus]
  Whoopee ti yi yo dudes, git along little dogies...

[dude]
  so i said "if you think that i'm here just for pleasure,
  that's where you've got me most awfully wrong,
  cause i'm sitting here listening to you, you (blank)ing bozo,
  as you stroll on down the mall, singing your (blank)ing song."

[chorus]
  Whoopee ti yi yo dudes, git along little dogies,
  It's your misfortune and none of my own.
  All the new little boxes just beyond the suburbs,
  Soon that frontier will be your new home.


with thanks to Malvina Reynolds for "Little Boxes", The Monkees for "Pleasant Valley Sunday", Frank Zappa for "Montana", and R Buckminster Fuller for his brilliantly positive "Roam Home to a Dome" (tune: "Home on the Range")
also see - you don't have to dream - amazing denial